Life is Not a Competition: Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
By Jan Tegze

Comparing ourselves to others is something that almost everyone does. We compare ourselves to people who have achieved goals we want to achieve, but we don’t know all the sacrifices those people made to get there. It is important to remember that we can adore someone and admire them, but envying them will only drag us down.

Admiring a person elevates us, allows us to discover a new version of ourselves, and inspires us. Instead of thinking, “Why not me?” remember that everything depends on you.

Of course, everyone has a different life, but the only person who can change your life is you.

Why Comparing Yourself to Others Is Ruining You

Comparing yourself to others means that you subconsciously believe that you need to be perfect or at least as good as those you compare yourself to. But nobody is perfect. Each and every one of us has qualities and aspects that we are better at than others.

When you compare yourself to others, you fall into the trap of believing that you need to be good at everything. Holding such unbelievably high standards can only hurt your self-esteem and confidence in your abilities. We are only human, after all. The best thing we can do is strive to be good at a few selected aspects and focus on our good qualities.

There are three things you should do to stop comparing yourself to others: focus on your successes, get inspired, and surround yourself with the right people.

  1. Focus on Your Successes

I have been doing this for years, and I can tell you that it has had a very positive impact on my thought process, how I feel, and most importantly, how I perceive myself. I stopped comparing my achievements to others who achieved more, and I now focus only on what I have achieved.

Focusing on your successes is something you have to learn to do. It’s very important to keep in mind what you have already accomplished and all the goals—small and big—that you have achieved. It will go a long way in boosting your self-confidence, improving your trust in your abilities, and making you less prone to comparing yourself to others.

When you focus on your successes, you highlight your capacity to put your skills to good use to achieve your goals.

  1. Get Inspired Instead of Discouraged

Recognizing the difference between jealousy and admiration is a key element to success in your self-improvement journey. Jealousy will only hold you back and may create tension and unnecessary interpersonal problems. Jealousy is a mental cancer.

Getting inspired by someone you admire can be of great help in your quest towards self-growth and provide you with key steps to follow to improve. By changing your mindset and focusing on your qualities and assets, you can work towards improving them and evolving.

  1. Surround Yourself with the Right People

Your environment is a crucial element for your mental health and well-being. Being surrounded by toxic and negative people will only push you to compare yourself to them and drive down your self-esteem.

Surround yourself with positive and empathic friends. They will not only be there for you in tough times but also help you and encourage you to pursue your goals and your self-improvement journey.

Last Thoughts

When you compare yourself to others, you are not setting yourself on a path of self-growth but rather a path of self-destruction. There are almost eight billion people on the planet, so someone will almost always be better than you in one aspect or another. Life is not a competition. Focus on yourself!


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Jan Tegze

Jan Tegze, author of the book Full Stack Recruiter, results-oriented Talent Acquisition Leader with extensive experience in full life cycle recruiting, and broad knowledge in international recruiting, sourcing, recruitment branding, recruitment marketing, and pro-active innovative sourcing techniques. Author of the Sourcing.Games, and blogger who believes that recruitment is a great field and he is constantly trying to make it better.